Can you believe that Christmas will be here in less than a week? I can’t. And I certainly don’t feel it here in Abu Dhabi, where we’ve been living for a little over two months. We moved to Abu Dhabi from Geneva just in time to experience its winter, which is like Swiss summer. Our new life in this time of the year looks nothing like the Christmas season we once knew.
Regardless of the significant changes and adjustments, life has been good to us in 2021. I know we are in the right location at the right time because we have tasted and seen God’s grace throughout the process. I don’t regret the move a bit, instead filled with gratitude. It feels like an upgrade for our life on earth in many ways.
UAE is a great country with a fascinating history. There are so many places to explore, things to do, and conversations in this part of the world. Although sometimes I miss the snowy mountains in Geneva, I enjoy going to the beach and swimming pool whenever I want because every day is a sunny day. With that to be said, we didn’t move here only to enjoy our life and brag about it on social media. We are here to work, to provide value, to live out our purpose, to raise our children in a way that they would be aligned with their purposes.
My husband has been enjoying his new job, and I’m home with the kids most of the day. If you have been following my blog at any time, you would know that being a stay-at-home mom isn’t my passion, and I don’t need more teaching about the value and importance of raising children. Nevertheless, I feel deep in my bone that there should be something more for me to do besides motherhood and homemaking.
You see, I love doing creative work, and I felt a deep sense of satisfaction when I shipped my artwork or my blog posts encouraged and resonated with someone to make her feel less alone. But in the past weeks, I hardly had time to write or paint anything because of my motherhood role. The kids had chickenpox one after the other and school holiday and another fever from the first time going to kindergarten. I barely could stay awake during the day.
However, what feels even more life-draining isn’t the physical exhaustion or the lack of time and energy to study the online courses I’d purchased, but the nagging question of “Am I running behind my purpose?”
Am I running behind? Am I too old for all the learning and logistic figuring and craft improving? Our family doesn’t need an extra income, and earning money isn’t my primary motivation. Can’t I simply be a mom and wife and enjoy myself with cups of tea when the kids go to school? The answer from my gut is a no. My reason comes down to stewardship. You see, we have all been given gifts by our Creator, and it’s our responsibility to identify them and use them for His glory and pleasure. And I desire to use all I am and have for my Creator God.
Now that I’m too occupied with children and housework to engage in any creative work these days, what shall I do?
I sit on a beach chair facing the ocean, feeling the warmth of sunshine on my skin. My husband and children are happily playing with sand by the sea. At this moment, they don’t need me. So I turn my mind to God and begin to process with Him. “What are you asking of me now, God?” A verse came to mind: “Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path.” (Ps 119:105). “I’m leading you, and I will lead you.” I feel God say.
Suddenly, I was relieved from those questions bugging me for weeks. He is a real God who leads me. His word gives me vision (light on my path ) and shows me the next best step (lamp for my feet). He is the Lord of my 20s and 30s and will be the Lord of my 40s, 50s, 60s and so on. Under his leadership, I will never be late or behind. Motherhood is my assignment for this season. When my children go to school, I will have more time building a creative business and doing other things. I’m not here to make a name for myself. I’m here to learn to be a faithful steward in every season of life.
My friend, it may have taken a while to convey my point in this post, but please bear with me because I only slept about five hours last night with a cracky but lovely two-year-old girl.
Maybe you are a busy mom with big dreams, but feeling defeated by the endless daily chores and wondered if you would ever have time for anything else. Maybe you’ve been caring for a sick family member for years and are too weary to even dream for yourself. Or perhaps you’ve wanted to start a particular project but kept putting it off because you doubted if you could see it through or wondered if you were too old to do anything new.
My dearest friend, I had doubts larger than the Alps when considering moving to the UAE. I’m 38, having two kids and starting to get grey hairs; do I have to start over in a part of the world I’ve never been to? Eventually, I said yes because I knew who was leading us.
In your darkest seasons or when considering your most impossible dreams, remember who is leading you, my friend.